
“You know before I saw these test results I had you pegged as a drifter.” – Dr. J. Loren Pryor
“Wow, a drifter . . .” – Bart Simpson
“Lousy sheriff, run me out of town, he’s lost my vote.” – Drifter Bart
“Cool.” – Bart Simpson
In our continuing mission to bring you only the finest in low class, low brow, and low tech internet Simpsons commentary we’re bringing back our “Crazy Noises” series and applying it to Season 21. Because doing a podcast smacks of effort we’re still using this “chatroom” thing that all the middle schoolers and undercover cops seem to think is so cool. This text has been edited for clarity and spelling (surprisingly enough not on “antithetical”).
We’re once again getting this up at the expiration date but here’s me and Dave carping about “Pranks and Greens”. (Mad Jon didn’t come in this week, he is presumed dead or on vacation.) Since this episode was utterly terrible and it’s just the two of us, it didn’t take very long at all. Hooray for half-assing things.
Charlie Sweatpants: Are we still on that awful prank episode? Thanks to the holiday it feels like a lot longer than just last Sunday.
Dave: Yeah, what’s on your mind?
Charlie Sweatpants: Oh, all kinds of shit.
Dave: I’ve successfully pushed it out my consciousness since watching it with you
Charlie Sweatpants: Well, like most of Zombie Simpsons, much as I hate it at the time it always gets worse the more I think about it.
Why did Bart care about this kid again?
Dave: Some misplaced notion about being outdone?
Charlie Sweatpants: And since when does he not think it’d be cool to be a drifter, or test dangerous food additives, or be a 19th century cockney boot black when he grows up?
Dave: That Bart died a long time ago.
Charlie Sweatpants: Yeah he died a long time ago, but this wasn’t just out of character, this was antithetical to everything he stands for.
The very core, the absolute heart of hearts of what makes Bart Simpson Bart Simpson (and what made him popular in the first place) is "underachiever and proud of it".
Dave: Absolutely. Sunday’s Bart spat in the face of that, and then turned into a soft, yielding reformist pushover in what seemed like three seconds
Charlie Sweatpants: Exactly.
Dave: It could’ve been any other character honestly.
They chose Bart so that we could get unnecessary Skinner/Groundskeeper Willie backstory as a bonus
Charlie Sweatpants: Oh yeah, that was terrible.
I’m a big advocate of the fact that the show doesn’t need to make sense from episode to episode, but how many times are we going to find out about Skinner’s background?
Dave: No shit.
Charlie Sweatpants: He was always a dork, no he was a rebel, no he was always a dork, at some point you can’t help but go numb.
Dave: Bingo. The idea of a "cool" Skinner is beyond preposterous
Charlie Sweatpants: And then there was the B-plot which even by the standards of B-plots was time filler. I mean, health food jokes? Ohh, take that Whole Foods.
Dave: I think we talked about that on Sunday – that’s easy comic fodder, but even they managed to fuck that up
There was no biting insight, just hackneyed cliches. Ohhh, parents concerned about BPA, take that yuppies
It makes me long for "Scenes from the Class Struggle in Springfield"
Charlie Sweatpants: Pretty much, I mean it’s one thing to take a topic that’s easily mocked and fail to mock it, but it’s another to include a little message at the end.
That’s a topic for another time, but the fact that the Simpsons really aren’t poor any more detracts from a lot of things.
Dave: There was a message?
Charlie Sweatpants: Well, the whole "I guess doing the best I can is alright" thing. I don’t know, maybe I was reading too much into it.
Dave: You’re right. They aren’t poor anymore…
That’s a pretty shit message. "I like me just the way I am"
Charlie Sweatpants: Anyway, is there anything we’ve missed on this one?
Dave: Nah, I don’t think so
We’ve got tried and true characters acting not like themselves for 20-some, laughter-devoid minutes
Charlie Sweatpants: Yeah, do we need to discuss the ending? With the worm tank and the "suspense" of whether or not Bart can save Krusty?
Dave: I think the less said about that the better.
Charlie Sweatpants: Good because the whole Bart doesn’t know it’s a stunt (lots of string music), but then it is, and then there’s a happy ending for everyone thing was just excruciating to watch.
Dave: Well look on the bright side, no new episodes for 2 whole weeks
Charlie Sweatpants: Really?
Sweet.
Dave: That’s my Black Friday gift to you.
I willed it so.
Charlie Sweatpants: Oh, you meant after this Sunday.
Damn you for getting my hopes up.
Dave: Oh yes, sorry.
I got my own hopes up too.
Charlie Sweatpants: Your cruelty has boomeranged on you.
Dave: And how!
Tell Aaronson and Zykowski:
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