Reading Digest: You Guys Are Giving the Internet a Bad Reputation Edition

Stark Raving Dad7

“This is what Michael Jackson looks like!  You look like a big, fat mental patient.” – Bart Simpson
“You’d be amazed how often I hear that.” – Leon Kompowsky

The pop culture internet had a minor conniption this week when one of the world’s least reputable news sources, TMZ, reported as a “bombshell” (their word) that Michael Jackson hadn’t done the singing in “Stark Raving Dad”.  This is something you can find out by reading just the introduction to the Wikipedia article for that episode.  You don’t even need to scroll down, it’s right there at the top; but if you do scroll down, you’ll see a heavily footnoted section dedicated to just that as well as a photo spread titled “The three voices of Leon Kompowsky”.  And yet it was reported as news by such august outfits as The Houston Chronicle and Kaplan Test Prep Daily, as well as theoretically internet savvy outlets like television blog Warming Glow (which is named for a Simpsons reference) and music website Consequence of Sound.  To repeat, this information was in the Wikipedia article with footnotes and pictures.  Stop and take a breath before you click publish, okay?

Of course, that’s not all we have.  There’s also some information on everyone’s favorite three hundred pound president, several people who want to see the show ended, some excellent usage, and a review of that porn movie.


It Was All Yellow: Reviewing the Simpsons Porn Parody – Smooth Charlie’s Click of the Week is this surprisingly positive, tongue-in-various cheeks review of the Simpsons porn movie.  I particularly like this:

However, the guy voicing Homer/playing Homer’s penis does a phenomenal Homer impression. To the point where for the first ten minutes I thought they might be using actual audio from the show. Then I realized that even in 22 seasons they would have had trouble finding a suitable response to “You like the way I suck your cock, Homey?”

520 – Taftography, or: a Conventional Portrait of the Candidate – A political cartoon featuring the face of William Howard Taft as the floor plan for the 1908 Republican Party convention.  It opens with the Mediocre Presidents song despite the fact that he isn’t mentioned in it, but that counts as excellent usage nonetheless.  There’s also some kinda awesome Taft quotes.  I could almost see this one being a Simpsons line:

I have come to the conclusion that the major part of the work of a President is to increase the gate receipts of expositions and fairs and bring tourists to town.

The Simpsons’ latest season – A review of Season 22, which, while far more forgiving of Zombie Simpsons than I am, does contain this:

In fact, I’m starting to think that whether or not you enjoy The Simpsons at this point depends on how bothered you are that the show keeps trotting out similar storylines to earlier episodes’. I’m certain that most of the storylines in series 22 could be compared to old episodes (sometimes multiple old episodes), using characters in the same ways time and again.

That’s just crazy enough to work . . .

Simpsons Video of the Week. – New York is that a way, man!

you sunk my battleship! – Heh, some school official in Britain threatened to replace striking teachers with parents.

Top 20 TV Quotes of all time – The Simpsons has three on here, including #1.

Beauty road test – Eyelash extensions – Technically the ones on the show were implants not extensions, but this is still an excellent reference:

If you’ve ever watched back-to-back reruns of The Simpsons (and let’s face it, you have), you may be familiar with the concept of eyelash extensions. They were the secret weapon (illegal in the United States!) that allowed the curly haired Shirley Temple clone to triumph over Lisa in the beauty pageant episode. If you’ve ever watched back to back reruns of The Simpsons, you may also be aware that the show’s absurdist sense of the surreal can ultimately end up communicating fundamental truths about the world we live in.

It sure does in this case: while they may not require an illegal cosmetic surgery trip to Mexico, eyelash extensions are a secret weapon.

And yeah, it was Paraguay not Mexico, but still.

Does anybody else want the simpsons to end? – I don’t generally think of Yahoo Answers as a useful source of information.  The, um, limited coherence of the opening rant here is a testament to why, but I like the response from “Jim”, a “Top Contributor”:

They should have ended that show a very long time ago. I can’t stand that show.

TMZ Breaks a Twenty-Year-Old Simpsons "Bombshell" – Our old friend Denise Du Vernay of “Simpsons in the Classroom” fame takes a look at the non-story Simpsons story I mentioned in the introduction.  She’s got all the details; I don’t have anything to add except to point out that dumb tends to beget dumb.  

"Honey, I’m chilly. Would you turn on the art?" – Excellent usage:

"I wouldn’t take it down if I were you," advises Bart in an episode of The Simpsons. "That’s a load-bearing poster."

Bart actually says “It’s” not “That’s”, but this is about a new material that can be used to make wall hangings heat your home, so I’m still counting it as excellent usage.

The Simpsons Coverage and Panel – Comic-Con 2011 – I enjoy how pretty much the only way they can fluff the Simpsons appearance at Comic-Con is by talking about upcoming guest voices.

ASCAP Honors Top Film and Television Music Composers at 26th Annual Awards Celebration – Apparently Jay Kogen was on hand to give Alf Clausen that award.  Aww.

Suggested Viewing material – YouTube of Homer missing Lisa and trying to play her “sax-a-ma-phone”.

Simpsons World Was a Pretty Sweet Purchase – Someone got that giant doorstop of a Simpsons reference book for $30 instead of the nutbar $150 they were asking.  For thirty bucks, it appears to be a good purchase.  Amazon wants $90 at the moment though.

events : FARM’s AR conference in sunny LA – Sam Simon is going to be speaking at an animal rights convention the weekend of July 22nd.

Mr. Popper’s Penguins…In 10 Words – Mr. Poppers Possums does have a nice ring to it.

What Everyone Secretly Wants to Do to His Boss – Animated .gif of Homer getting a pretty good sound out of that guy.

Have the Simpsons overstayed their welcome? – This holds out the kind of hope I haven’t had since about Season 10:

But what I do know is that I would like to see from the show, is one final season of the show returning to its former glory — no holding back, showing its fans that there is some juice still left for it to go out with a bang. Make one final season that tops all season, stay true to the original concept but milk it for all its worth. Come out on top, because the show deserves nothing less than an excellent exit —  but in order to do this, the showrunners should first recognize that all good things must come to an end. Even The Simpsons. It will be sad, but it will be worth it rather than ending the show with dismal ratings because everybody quit on it.

It’s much too late for that.  Oh sure, if they announced right now that Season 23 was going to be it, the finale would get huge ratings.  But I doubt any of the mid-season filler would see even the tiniest bump.  

The Best TV Shows – And finally, I get to end with two people who, in a discussion of their favorite shows, both agree with us:

I say it was hilarious from seasons 1 through 12; most fans will say it started declining after season 8 and reached its nadir (which has lasted right through season 22 and is sure to continue through 23) by season 10.  Probably better than Seinfeld at its peak (seasons 4-10), the depth and breadth of its style and plotlines is remarkable.  The massive ensemble of regular characters is huge, and none of them are space-fillers; somehow the writers came up with somewhere in the neighborhood of 50 rich and unique characters to inhabit the town of Springfield.  Consummate skill displayed by the voice actors.  This show also satisfied the intellectual viewer like no other.


Only the first 10 seasons count as Tier 1 material.  The next 13 seasons might find a place somewhere in the ballpark of Tier 25 if I’d gone that far.


1 Response to “Reading Digest: You Guys Are Giving the Internet a Bad Reputation Edition”

Comments are currently closed.


deadhomersociety (at) gmail

Run a Simpsons site or Twitter account? Let us know!

Twitter Updates

The Mob Has Spoken

Fuck the duck until… on Hey, Everybody! Zombie Simpson…
Big John's Breakfast… on Hey, Everybody! Zombie Simpson…
Relatives Dude on Hey, Everybody! Zombie Simpson…
Mr Incognito on Hey, Everybody! Zombie Simpson…
Zombie Sweatpants on Hey, Everybody! Zombie Simpson…
Bleeding Unprofitabl… on Hey, Everybody! Zombie Simpson…
Red sus on Quote of the Day
Rick on Quote of the Day
cm5675 on Quote of the Day
Bleeding Gums Murphy on Quote of the Day

Subscribe to Our Newsletter


Useful Legal Tidbit

Even though it’s obvious to anyone with a functional frontal lobe and a shred of morality, we feel the need to include this disclaimer. This website (which openly advocates for the cancellation of a beloved television series) is in no way, shape or form affiliated with the FOX Network, the News Corporation, subsidiaries thereof, or any of Rupert Murdoch’s wives or children. “The Simpsons” is (unfortunately) the intellectual property of FOX. We and our crack team of one (1) lawyer believe that everything on this site falls under the definition of Fair Use and is protected by the First Amendment to the United States Constitution. No revenue is generated from this endeavor; we’re here because we love “The Simpsons”. And besides, you can’t like, own a potato, man, it’s one of Mother Earth’s creatures.

%d bloggers like this: