Crazy Noises: Bart to the Future

Bart to the Future1

“When we’re finished, we can go through Bill Clinton’s porno stash.” – Bart Simpson

For the fourth summer in a row, we here at the Dead Homer Society will be spending some time discussing twelve year old Simpsons episodes.  This year we’re doing Season 11.  Why Season 11?  Because we’ve done Seasons 8, 9 and 10 already, and it’s time to take an unflinching look at the end of the show.  Since Skype and podcasts didn’t exist in 1999, and we want to discuss these episodes the way the internet intended, we’re sticking with the UTF-8 world of chat rooms and instant messaging.  This text has been edited for clarity and spelling (especially on “noticeable”).

Mad Jon: You guys ready to start the first one?

Dave: Sure, why not?

Charlie Sweatpants: Yeah, let’s dive in.

Not to start things on too much of a downer or anything, but this episode is really tough to watch and has almost no redeeming value. I’d basically forgotten it existed, and I am eager to return to that state.

Mad Jon: Yeah, I not a huge fan of the episodes that go to the future as such.

Dave: Too many future jokes, most dull and uninspired.

Signal:Noise bad.

Charlie Sweatpants: Good way to put it.

What’s really striking is how lame this future is compared to the one in Lisa’s Wedding.

Mad Jon: I wonder how much of that is due to the time frame.

But I wholeheartedly agree.

Lisa’s wedding is only, what, 12 years in the future? This one adds another 20+.

Charlie Sweatpants: Yeah, but shouldn’t that give them more license and made it easier?

Mad Jon: Yes. But it makes it harder for us to deal with. They could have gone anywhere with the age, but kept it simple, and I still hate it.

Charlie Sweatpants: I don’t think they could’ve or would’ve done anything with it, but there’s just as little thought put into the setting here as there is to the story.

Mad Jon: If they would have gone nuts with the future, it would have been worse.

Charlie Sweatpants: Probably.

But they’re the ones who set it in the future, and so when they basically ignore that, it makes the episode even less fun to watch.

Mad Jon: I can buy that.

For sure.

Charlie Sweatpants: And there’s the big, giant, in your ear problem that both Bart and Ralph have their normal goddamn voices the whole time.

Mad Jon: Yeah, that was quite noticeable.

Charlie Sweatpants: I’m sure someone on staff had watched “Lisa’s Wedding”, Cartwright might have even remembered doing the lower Bart voice for the future there. It really shows how little they cared by this time.

Mad Jon: More of a “get it done and let’s go drinking” mentality.

Charlie Sweatpants: Very much so.

Mad Jon: As long as we are discussing laziness.

I would like to address how Marge, Homer, and Maggie’s kid Maggie are automatically at the White House.

Charlie Sweatpants: There was that.

Mad Jon: Bart gets the idea to mooch off of his sister, who I guess he just found out was president? He makes the move to go there, and the family lives there too?

After Bart just asked them for cash at home?

Charlie Sweatpants: It makes very, very little sense.

Mad Jon: How about that Bart and Ralph are bottom barrel broke, but live on the water?

Dave: Because why not.

Charlie Sweatpants: Apparently in some kind of tropical area, too.

Mad Jon: Apparently so.

Charlie Sweatpants: To the same point, Bart just walks into the White House and has the run of the place.

I don’t think there’s a single scene in the future that makes sense even just within itself.

Mad Jon: And is able to march into a meeting of various world leaders untouched as well.

Charlie Sweatpants: Around the future thing, there isn’t any sense to the Indian casino guy taking Bart on his little vision quest either.

Mad Jon: Doesn’t seem like a good use of his time, does it?

Charlie Sweatpants: It doesn’t. More importantly, they really dropped the ball on making fun of Indian casinos, which are among the most depressing places you can ever visit.

All they did was haul out some (mostly) lame Indian jokes. Ha ha, he’s got “crazy” in his name.

Though I did like the one about the linen service having broken many promises. That at least had some originality to it. Most of it? Zilch.

Mad Jon: Yeah, I haven’t spent much time in Indian casinos, but I imagine there was some pretty good material to be had.

Instead they have Bart on his own, for some reason, and a guy making 100k a minute using a vision to advertise his casino to a 10-year-old.

Charlie Sweatpants: There isn’t anything in this episode that doesn’t feel slapped together in, like you said, a “get it done and let’s go drinking” kind of way.

Mad Jon: The only thing I liked was the first Kearny explanation of the three secret murders. But they couldn’t leave it at that.

Wait, also I liked the Rod and Todd thing too.

Short and sweet.

Charlie Sweatpants: But even that made no sense.

They’re just there?

Mad Jon: No sense indeed, but a good visual gag of the two 40 yr old men with mustaches.

Charlie Sweatpants: Fair enough. In terms of things they couldn’t just drop, the park ranger saying that the bugs are “firmly in charge” is funny, then they take his ring . . . and then they take his hand. What the fuck?

Mad Jon: Yeah, again the normal ‘take things one to three steps too far’ was abound.

Count me not surprised.

And for that matter, consider my opinion of the ending along the same terms.

Charlie Sweatpants: Hey, we might not have gotten it through our thick skulls that Bart can deal with creditors the first four times.

Mad Jon: But we used to be cool!

Ok, we all agree that this one is terrible bordering upon criminal, correct? Anyone have anything else to add before we move on?

Charlie Sweatpants: I dunno, “first straight female president” was kinda funny, as was Clinton’s porn stash, but we’ve barely even mentioned that idiotic B-plot, which even they were a little ashamed of.

Mad Jon: Oh yeah, forgot about Lincoln’s gold.

Sorry to jump the gun.

Charlie Sweatpants: I don’t really need to delve into those if you guys don’t, though. This script should’ve been thrown into the sea.

Mad Jon: I did like Clinton’s stash. By the way, was Uter at the council of coolness?

Charlie Sweatpants: I dunno. I could check in less time than it’ll take me to finish typing this sentence, but I’m not going to.

Mad Jon: Probably for the best.

Charlie Sweatpants: Yeah, Dave anything?

Dave: Hey, sorry. Distracted, nothing from me.

Charlie Sweatpants: Okay, let’s run far away from this episode and . . . oh, crap, the next one is the one where Barney quits drinking, isn’t it?

Mad Jon: Yes. Unfortunately you are correct.

Charlie Sweatpants: Okay, let’s get started. I’m going to get the whisky.

Mad Jon: Thank God.

Dave: Let’s see how drunk we can get.

4 Responses to “Crazy Noises: Bart to the Future”

  1. 1 Dan S.
    5 September 2012 at 12:58 pm

    In Lias’s wedding they also hinted at Bart’s road to the Supreme Court. Here he seems to be taking the most delayed circuitous route or the court has really dropped its standards in the future.

  2. 5 September 2012 at 1:26 pm

    And with this episode, I at last said “fuck this show.”

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