“Coming up next, a new fad that’s sweeping the nation: wasting food.” – Scott Christian
Archive for May, 2019
31
May
19
Quote of the Day
30
May
19
Quote of the Day
“Sir, we’ll need a new dangerous emissions supervisor.” – Mr. Smithers
“Yes, well, find someone cheap. It’s been a very lean year for us.” – C.M. Burns
“Money fight!” – C.M. Burns & Mr. Smithers
28
May
19
Quote of the Day
“Back, you robots! Nobody ruins my family vacation but me! And maybe the boy!” – Homer Simpson
27
May
19
Quote of the Day
“Some large men to see you, sir.” – Secretary
“I don’t have an appointment with any large men.” – Principal Skinner
Happy birthday Jo Ann Harris!
26
May
19
Quote of the Day
“Hey, you’re that drunken posse! Wow. Can I join you?” – Jimbo Jones
“I don’t know. Can you swing a sack of doorknobs?” – Homer Simpson
“Can I!” – Jimbo Jones
“You’re in! Here’s the sack.” – Homer Simpson
“But you gotta supply your own knobs.” – Moe
25
May
19
Quote of the Day
“But I keep telling you, I’m not a pilot!” – Homer Simpson
“And I keep telling you you fly boys crack me up!” – Crazy Clown Airlines Guy
“Hi, I’m Alan, I’m your co-pilot.” – Alan
“Uh, yeah, um, as a change of pace, I’m going to let you do most of the work. I think you’re ready for it, Alan. And, um, I’ll just get us started.” – Homer Simpson
“Uh, we’ll need that to live.” – Alan
24
May
19
Quote of the Day
“He’s a worthy foe. Look at him, Smithers, exercising away while the others are off at the candy machine.” – C.M. Burns
“Hey, Lenny, can you get this Sugar Daddy off my back?” – Homer Simpson
“Okay, but it’s the last time.” – Lenny
24
May
19
Makeup Quote of the Day
“Why, Homer, you silly goose. The weed whacker’s just for the edges. You’re going to be out here all day.” – Ned Flanders
“I’m almost done.” – Homer Simpson
22
May
19
Quote of the Day
“I first knew the show was a hit when I walked into school and a kid was wearing a Bart Simpson t-shirt. FOX had an endless supply of clever slogans, man.” – Bart Simpson
21
May
19
Quote of the Day
“Hey, if you guys are getting loaded off them fumes, I’m gonna have to charge ya.” – Moe
“Man alive! There are men alive in here.” – Safety Inspector
20
May
19
Quote of the Day
“Before we start, we have a lost child here. If she’s not claimed within the next hour, she will become property of Blockbuster Entertainment.” – DJ Muggs
19
May
19
Quote of the Day
“Apparently, that disturbing odor was the food.” – Sideshow Mel
18
May
19
Quote of the Day
“The Moon. For several years, she has fascinated many. But will Man ever walk on her fertile surface? Democratic hopeful Adlai Stevenson says so.” – Moon of Earth Filmstrip Narrator
“I have no objection to Man walking on the Moon.” – Adlai Stevenson
17
May
19
Quote of the Day
“Look, honey, I clipped on my tie all by myself.” – Homer Simpson
16
May
19
Quote of the Day
“Ahh, folks, we’re experiencing some moderate, Godzilla related turbulence at this time, so I’m gonna go ahead and ask you to put your seatbelts back on. When we get to 35,000 feet he usually does let go. So from there on out all we have to do is worry about Mothra, and we do have reports he’s tied up with Gamera and Rodan at the present time. Thank you very much.” – Air Japan Pilot
15
May
19
Quote of the Day
“No knife games on the kitchen table!” – Marge Simpson
“I didn’t hit your precious table!” – Homer Simpson
14
May
19
Quote of the Day
“Gun it, Flanders!” – Bart Simpson
“It won’t start. Something’s draining the battery.” – Ned Flanders
“Sorry.” – Homer Simpson
13
May
19
Quote of the Day
“It’s time to take out the trash.” – Bette Midler
“I’ll get you for this, Midler!” – Doomed Litterer
12
May
19
Quote of the Day
“I’m gonna keep this Mary Worth phone right here. Here stern but sensible face will remind me never to do anything so stupid again.” – Bart Simpson
“Hey, Bart, you wanna go play with that x-ray machine in the abandoned hospital?” – Milhouse van Houten
“Sure.” – Bart Simpson
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(The crotch really does wear out too fast.)
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