Posts Tagged ‘Bart to the Future


Quote of the Day

“Let’s go, Marge! C’mon! C’mon! C’mon!” – Homer Simpson
“Homer, you know I have a gambling problem.” – Marge Simpson
“Well, what better place to celebrate your recovery than amidst the frenzied excitement of the casino floor?” – Homer Simpson


Quote of the Day

“I’m not sure mosquito season is the best time to visit Larval Lake.” – Marge Simpson
“Folks, you’re gonna wanna turn around. The bugs are firmly in charge.” – Park Ranger


Quote of the Day

Bart to the Future3

“You put an ad in my vision?” – Bart Simpson
“Yeah. Crazy Talk came up with that. Got idea from Dances with Focus Groups.” – Indian Casino Manager


Quote of the Day

Bart to the Future2

“Oh, hi, Bart, how much this time?” – Ned Flanders
“Dude, you got me all wrong.” – Bart Simpson
“Yeah.  Just answer me this: are you holding your mooching sack?” – Ned Flanders
“My little one.” – Bart Simpson


Crazy Noises: Bart to the Future

Bart to the Future1

“When we’re finished, we can go through Bill Clinton’s porno stash.” – Bart Simpson

For the fourth summer in a row, we here at the Dead Homer Society will be spending some time discussing twelve year old Simpsons episodes.  This year we’re doing Season 11.  Why Season 11?  Because we’ve done Seasons 8, 9 and 10 already, and it’s time to take an unflinching look at the end of the show.  Since Skype and podcasts didn’t exist in 1999, and we want to discuss these episodes the way the internet intended, we’re sticking with the UTF-8 world of chat rooms and instant messaging.  This text has been edited for clarity and spelling (especially on “noticeable”).

Mad Jon: You guys ready to start the first one?

Dave: Sure, why not?

Charlie Sweatpants: Yeah, let’s dive in.

Not to start things on too much of a downer or anything, but this episode is really tough to watch and has almost no redeeming value. I’d basically forgotten it existed, and I am eager to return to that state.

Mad Jon: Yeah, I not a huge fan of the episodes that go to the future as such.

Dave: Too many future jokes, most dull and uninspired.

Signal:Noise bad.

Charlie Sweatpants: Good way to put it.

What’s really striking is how lame this future is compared to the one in Lisa’s Wedding.

Mad Jon: I wonder how much of that is due to the time frame.

But I wholeheartedly agree.

Lisa’s wedding is only, what, 12 years in the future? This one adds another 20+.

Charlie Sweatpants: Yeah, but shouldn’t that give them more license and made it easier?

Mad Jon: Yes. But it makes it harder for us to deal with. They could have gone anywhere with the age, but kept it simple, and I still hate it.

Charlie Sweatpants: I don’t think they could’ve or would’ve done anything with it, but there’s just as little thought put into the setting here as there is to the story.

Mad Jon: If they would have gone nuts with the future, it would have been worse.

Charlie Sweatpants: Probably.

But they’re the ones who set it in the future, and so when they basically ignore that, it makes the episode even less fun to watch.

Mad Jon: I can buy that.

For sure.

Charlie Sweatpants: And there’s the big, giant, in your ear problem that both Bart and Ralph have their normal goddamn voices the whole time.

Mad Jon: Yeah, that was quite noticeable.

Charlie Sweatpants: I’m sure someone on staff had watched “Lisa’s Wedding”, Cartwright might have even remembered doing the lower Bart voice for the future there. It really shows how little they cared by this time.

Mad Jon: More of a “get it done and let’s go drinking” mentality.

Charlie Sweatpants: Very much so.

Mad Jon: As long as we are discussing laziness.

I would like to address how Marge, Homer, and Maggie’s kid Maggie are automatically at the White House.

Charlie Sweatpants: There was that.

Mad Jon: Bart gets the idea to mooch off of his sister, who I guess he just found out was president? He makes the move to go there, and the family lives there too?

After Bart just asked them for cash at home?

Charlie Sweatpants: It makes very, very little sense.

Mad Jon: How about that Bart and Ralph are bottom barrel broke, but live on the water?

Dave: Because why not.

Charlie Sweatpants: Apparently in some kind of tropical area, too.

Mad Jon: Apparently so.

Charlie Sweatpants: To the same point, Bart just walks into the White House and has the run of the place.

I don’t think there’s a single scene in the future that makes sense even just within itself.

Mad Jon: And is able to march into a meeting of various world leaders untouched as well.

Charlie Sweatpants: Around the future thing, there isn’t any sense to the Indian casino guy taking Bart on his little vision quest either.

Mad Jon: Doesn’t seem like a good use of his time, does it?

Charlie Sweatpants: It doesn’t. More importantly, they really dropped the ball on making fun of Indian casinos, which are among the most depressing places you can ever visit.

All they did was haul out some (mostly) lame Indian jokes. Ha ha, he’s got “crazy” in his name.

Though I did like the one about the linen service having broken many promises. That at least had some originality to it. Most of it? Zilch.

Mad Jon: Yeah, I haven’t spent much time in Indian casinos, but I imagine there was some pretty good material to be had.

Instead they have Bart on his own, for some reason, and a guy making 100k a minute using a vision to advertise his casino to a 10-year-old.

Charlie Sweatpants: There isn’t anything in this episode that doesn’t feel slapped together in, like you said, a “get it done and let’s go drinking” kind of way.

Mad Jon: The only thing I liked was the first Kearny explanation of the three secret murders. But they couldn’t leave it at that.

Wait, also I liked the Rod and Todd thing too.

Short and sweet.

Charlie Sweatpants: But even that made no sense.

They’re just there?

Mad Jon: No sense indeed, but a good visual gag of the two 40 yr old men with mustaches.

Charlie Sweatpants: Fair enough. In terms of things they couldn’t just drop, the park ranger saying that the bugs are “firmly in charge” is funny, then they take his ring . . . and then they take his hand. What the fuck?

Mad Jon: Yeah, again the normal ‘take things one to three steps too far’ was abound.

Count me not surprised.

And for that matter, consider my opinion of the ending along the same terms.

Charlie Sweatpants: Hey, we might not have gotten it through our thick skulls that Bart can deal with creditors the first four times.

Mad Jon: But we used to be cool!

Ok, we all agree that this one is terrible bordering upon criminal, correct? Anyone have anything else to add before we move on?

Charlie Sweatpants: I dunno, “first straight female president” was kinda funny, as was Clinton’s porn stash, but we’ve barely even mentioned that idiotic B-plot, which even they were a little ashamed of.

Mad Jon: Oh yeah, forgot about Lincoln’s gold.

Sorry to jump the gun.

Charlie Sweatpants: I don’t really need to delve into those if you guys don’t, though. This script should’ve been thrown into the sea.

Mad Jon: I did like Clinton’s stash. By the way, was Uter at the council of coolness?

Charlie Sweatpants: I dunno. I could check in less time than it’ll take me to finish typing this sentence, but I’m not going to.

Mad Jon: Probably for the best.

Charlie Sweatpants: Yeah, Dave anything?

Dave: Hey, sorry. Distracted, nothing from me.

Charlie Sweatpants: Okay, let’s run far away from this episode and . . . oh, crap, the next one is the one where Barney quits drinking, isn’t it?

Mad Jon: Yes. Unfortunately you are correct.

Charlie Sweatpants: Okay, let’s get started. I’m going to get the whisky.

Mad Jon: Thank God.

Dave: Let’s see how drunk we can get.


No Seriously, Take it!

“Oh come on Edna! We both know these children have no future!!” – Seymour Skinner

In the second part of my two part series chronicling my hatred of Zombie Simpsons episodes involving time shifts, I will address the failures of episodes with a flashforward premise. As I warned in the end of part one, there will be some similarities in this post. If you think I am just being lazy (which I do not deny), try this exercise: Make a list of reasons you think the shit your dog took this morning was gross, then make a list of reasons why the shit your dog will take tonight will be gross. You may be pleasantly surprised. Now that you have a better understanding of what I am dealing with, let us get to my complaints with flashforward Zombie Simpsons episodes.

One other point of note, there are only a couple of these episodes. This may be a result of the writers realizing how bad the episodes would be, but that would be a bit optimistic on my part.

1. Impossible team ups.
In the 11th season episode “Bart To The Future” Bart and Ralph are not only roomates but bandmates as well. This couldn’t happen because I don’t think they let you start bands in prison or the assisted living home.

2. Bart’s efforts to regain his sister’s love
In both of the episodes I can remember (the other being “Future Drama”) some issue arises between Bart and Lisa with Bart getting some benefit and Lisa being on the short end. In both cases Bart comes through to save the day and regain his sister’s appreciation. While this tactic produced hilarious results in real Simpsons episodes ( like “Stark Raving Dad”) keep in mind that their drama wasn’t the ONLY plot point and future Bart (who like I said would probably be incarcerated) wouldn’t be forced to live with Lisa and probably wouldn’t give two shits about her predicaments.

3. Homer is alive
If you are trying to portray the future, you are doing so based upon the years of episodes that have forged some sort of pattern or predictability of character actions. With that in mind, Homer (who in most episodes is 38) won’t make it to 40. This wouldn’t bother me so much if Homer and Marge weren’t divorced in “Future Drama” which would never happen if you follow the logic I just mentioned. My suggestion is to never ever make a flashforward episode again and just avoid the issue altogether. While you’re at it, just stop making Zombie Simpsons period.

4. History
Just like with the flashback episodes, the flashforward episodes (minus “Lisa’s Wedding”) are completly and undebatably unwatchable. While watching these episodes I actually prayed to God that the commercials would get stuck in an infinite loop.

There you have it. If you add up my complaints from both part one and part two of this series, you will come to the same sobering conclusion I already have: This Sunday’s episode will be terrrible. The extra ‘r’ is for rreally.


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